You Say License, I Say Licence...

Here's the end of the licence saga...

Oh, and may I just say, I've received a lot of flack (phone calls, emails, comments) about how I spelled licence.  But in my defense, both license and licence are correct spellings.  Licence is British English and license is American English.  But, since I'm a European American with mostly British ancestry I feel at liberty to use either spelling.  So there.

Idaho came through for me, big time.  Christmas Eve I went over to the Jefferson County DMV.  They were closing at 2:00 but the lady on the phone told me I'd be okay if I made it there by 1:00.  Since I don't have any utilities in my name and since in the past year I have at least sort of worked a little for Batt Construction Lee wrote me a paystub for my "work" (aka: pro bono work) for the last few weeks. 

So I tell the lady I need a new Idaho DL and hand her my temporary Utah license and my paystub. 

Then she says, "Your paystub needs your address on it." 

Me: "What?"

DL lady: "Yeah, your paystub needs to show the address where you live."

Ahhhhhhhhhhhh I thought it just needed to show that I had worked in Idaho recently.  So at this point I'm COMPLETELY frustrated with this whole driver's licence problem.  What do they seriously expect homeless people to do?...not drive?...that's ridiculous. 

I think I was especially frustrated because I found out Christmas Eve morning that due to the delay getting a licence my Brazilian visa was now going to cost me $450!  

So anyway, right there at the DMV I start crying.  Not sobbing or anything super embarrassing, but just normal DMV-type crying.  And through my tears I say to the DL lady, "Is there anything I can do to prove that I live in Idaho?"

And then I just told her the truth, the truth and nothing but the truth.  That I just graduated from college and that I was living in Idaho with my grandma until I find a job and sort of working for my family's business.  And that I'm not really mentally unstable but that I've been trying for weeks to get a valid licence, with no success. 

She was super nice and just said, "Well, we can have your grandma sign an affidavit saying that you live with her."

To which I replied, "My grandma is in Brazil and won't be back for a week.  I have to have my new licence by Monday so I can apply for a Brazilian visa."

I'm sure my story had to sound kind of fishy...my 83 year old grandma off in Brazil.  BUT, it was the truth!

DL lady: "What's your grandma's name?"

Me: "Fern F******."

DL lady: "Oh, I know Fern, she's in my ward.  That's right, she is in Brazil." (Only in Idaho!) 

So while we're discussing how the DL lady knew (and loved) my grandparents, a lady comes in from the hall and says to the DL lady, "my mom is in your ward too and I can vouch that this girl is a Batt...doesn't she look like a Batt?"

It was kind of random, but was nice that a lady I didn't even know was saying that I was who I was. 

Then the nice DL lady was trying to figure out how she could give me my driver's licence even though I didn't have any way to document before they closed in an hour that I did (as of December 23rd) live in Idaho.  

She was like: "Your Uncle Dale and cousin Brian were in here just a few hours ago, maybe I could just call them." 

And then as we continued to chat I asked the DL lady where she lived and it just so happened that she lived on the same street as my parents.  So I told her where my parents lived and she said, "Oh, so your dad is Alan?"

Me: "Yup."

Her: "Oh, Alan was our Stake President...he is a great guy, blah, blah, blah...he's on a mission right now in Brazil."

Me: "Yup, that's why my grandma is down there visiting."  I think she may have been a little confused as to why my grandma Fern, who she probably didn't know was related to my dad, would be visiting my parents and it took her a minute to realize that she was my mom's mom. 

Her: "Well, I know your grandparents, parents, aunt and uncle, and if you say you live in Idaho then you live in Idaho."

Then there was this police lady just standing behind the desk with her and she said, "Yeah, if she says she lives in Idaho, she lives in Idaho!"

I took the driving test, passed with flying colors, and soon had my new, non-temporary Idaho DL in my possession. 

And...the nice DL lady typed in my weight that I had on my Utah DL from 5 years ago and not the new weight that was on my temporary licence.  Yay for her!  But, of course my picture is SUPER ugly and I have like 16 chins in it.  I look like I weigh 400 pounds.  So, by my picture you'd think I weighed 400+ pounds and had KFC crumbs lost in my fat rolls, but by my weight on my DL you'd think I was quite normal.  The truth is that I'm somewhere in between. 

And that, folks, is just one reason why I love Idaho.  I have no address on record but the nice DL lady, random lady in the hall, and police lady all vouched for me.  Thank you, thank you.  Small towns are the best!

Now I've just got to get my visa application down to the visa company in SLC ASAP and hopefully I'll get my visa back in time.  Anybody know any nice and trustworthy people that are going to SLC in the next couple of days?  I don't know if I trust the mail at this point.