Do you ever just wake up suddenly in the night and not know what woke you up so that freaks you out even more then if you knew what it was that woke you up? I do sometimes. Luckily not that often because I live alone so it really can freak me out if I let it. So last night I woke up suddenly at 3:24 A.M. and because I don't know what woke me up I instantly assume that some crazy person is coming to kill me or something. You know how it is when you get woken up in the middle of the night...your thoughts aren't maybe the most rational. So I grab the mace that I keep nearby and instantly make a plan to run for my Gingher sewing scissors. Mace to the face and scissors for where it counts. I know though that even with all the variety of weapons that I have hidden in my room and house, that I'm going to probably going to die. And this is how weird I am...it was 3:24 in the morning though...but I honestly thought to myself, 'I wouldn't really care if they killed me (as long as they did it quickly), but I can't die now, my house is SUCH A MESS and what will people think when they come to find my body?' Because my house is a mess right now, and I usually really do keep it quite spotless. In my defense though, I have been working a lot lately and I just started up school again so my life has been pretty crazy busy and I've hardly been home other then just to sleep. So, there I am, about to die, and I HONESTLY was worried about what people would think when they saw how messy my house is right now. Yeah, I know it is maybe a little weird. Anyway, in conclusion nobody killed me and I still haven't had time to clean my house since school started on Monday. But I'll get it cleaned. I can't be worrying about things like that when I may need to fight for my life. This is a true story. The end.
Tuesday, January 8, 2008
Am I weird? Okay, don't answer that.
Do you ever just wake up suddenly in the night and not know what woke you up so that freaks you out even more then if you knew what it was that woke you up? I do sometimes. Luckily not that often because I live alone so it really can freak me out if I let it. So last night I woke up suddenly at 3:24 A.M. and because I don't know what woke me up I instantly assume that some crazy person is coming to kill me or something. You know how it is when you get woken up in the middle of the night...your thoughts aren't maybe the most rational. So I grab the mace that I keep nearby and instantly make a plan to run for my Gingher sewing scissors. Mace to the face and scissors for where it counts. I know though that even with all the variety of weapons that I have hidden in my room and house, that I'm going to probably going to die. And this is how weird I am...it was 3:24 in the morning though...but I honestly thought to myself, 'I wouldn't really care if they killed me (as long as they did it quickly), but I can't die now, my house is SUCH A MESS and what will people think when they come to find my body?' Because my house is a mess right now, and I usually really do keep it quite spotless. In my defense though, I have been working a lot lately and I just started up school again so my life has been pretty crazy busy and I've hardly been home other then just to sleep. So, there I am, about to die, and I HONESTLY was worried about what people would think when they saw how messy my house is right now. Yeah, I know it is maybe a little weird. Anyway, in conclusion nobody killed me and I still haven't had time to clean my house since school started on Monday. But I'll get it cleaned. I can't be worrying about things like that when I may need to fight for my life. This is a true story. The end.
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11 comments:
Hidden mace?? Hidden shears?? What are you, Dwight Schrute?? Let me guess, next you'll be talking about the nunchucks hidden in your bed post and the blow-dart gun in your toilet bowl.
Oh, and yes, you are weird.
Yeah, I for one don't know how it is when "you suddenly get woken up in the night and your mind gets carried away with you." I sleep deeply and soundly, and if I do wake up my thoughts aren't on anything other than "I want to go back to sleep," or "why can't I get back to sleep, that's what I need to be doing right now."
I guess it's good I'm not easily scared, though being startled momentarily is another matter entirely. I totally screamed loud and hard at the zoo the other day when the gorrilla suddenly banged it's fist against the glass where we were. It was not in a good mood. And all we did was look at it. I swear he flipped me off in another language too.
hahaha, that's quite the story. I'll have to tell my husband because he thinks I'm paranoid about killers in the house too. I have hidden weapons too- okay, well, just the huge mag-light next to the bed. I figure I'll shine the light in their face so they are temporally blinded, then hit them over the head with it. I think it's a good idea.
Your blog cracks me up...mostly because you read my mind a little bit. I've totally done that...woken up for no reason and assumed it was because someone was in the house robbing me blind. But then I usually think, "take what you want, I live with roommates and all my valuable stuff is in my bedroom, and my door is locked, so you will only get their junk, suckas". Point one for me. Point zero for imagined robber/murderer.
Although there was this one time when I was woken up at "way too early in the morning" a.m. and there actually was a robber. Some drunk guy kicked in my neighbors window. It was loud. It took him like 3 kicks to break the glass. So first there was kicking, then glass shattering, then running away, and then police for the next 2 hours. He must have been really drunk.
Long comment, sorry, but it was a good post.
Some people may think you have a screw loose....But not me!! On several occasions I have woke up convinced I was about to be murdered and actually put the same type of sewing scissors under my pillow.... A little dangerous... but it was my life and my kids life on the line. I guess I think Toby would just sleep through our brutal murders... So I have to save my family. Then I wake a few hours later and realize I'm a complete moron!!
Okay so I can totally relate with you on this one. At 5:15 am, I hear a very large crash by my front door. Fearing my baby's life I fly out of bed and into his room. Everything is okay - then back to my room where my scared husband is hiding in bed. When I finally talked him in to getting up and checking the front door, he finds our wall clock lying on the tile. Whew!!!!
Maybe I will start stashing scissors around the house or frying pans like my sister.
wow....hahha.. thank you for the very hearty laugh. you are truly one of a kind ;)
I read Jerry's comment, and it made me laugh. I shared it with my husband... he said, wow, they even go at it when they are not at work... I guess that way if they didn't have the last say at work, they can finish it on Becca's blog." Thanks for the laugh. Enjoy playing with pee, and nasal fluid tommorow...
WOW, there are a lot of freaked out people out there! The only time I have ever been REAL scared is in our house in Wisconsin... I SWEAR we weren't alone! It was built in the 1890's and so there was a lot of history there. Lane tried to convince me that it wasn't haunted and he almost had me believing him UNTIL I had that guy break in while Daws and I were there alone and wouldn't LEAVE! From then on I was ALWAYS a little nervous!
Are ya glad I told a whole story on your comments?? I should write a post about that experience so I can get some sympathy from my readers that haven't heard this story huh?.?.? coming soon....
dear becca:
you should write a new blog.
they are interesting.
especially one's where you dream of killing others.
please write more
perhaps you could write one about your shopping skills.
regards,
a secret admirer
I guess I can cross "worrying about Rebecca living alone" off my list now that I know you have the mace AND the scissors to protect yourself. MOM
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