Becca Reviews In-N-Out and Idaho...all in one blog post

Back in 2002 I ate at In-N-Out while visiting Southern California because, well,  you have to eat at In-N-Out when you're in California.  But I couldn't really remember what I thought of the place.  


So, now that In-N-Out has finally made it to SLC, I thought I'd try it again.  


And let me just tell you, I now know why I couldn't remember what I thought of the place...I couldn't remember because it just isn't that great.  It's not horrible, but not great...completely unmemorable.


Here's my review:


The fries are really dry and flavorless.  Skip them.


The shakes don't have much flavor and seem to be made of fake ingredients that don't melt like a shake should melt.  I only ate about a third of mine and left the rest to melt.  It didn't really melt but just turned into foam.  It was weird.  Yuck.


The hamburgers are okay.  Really, they aren't bad for a fast-food hamburger, but they're still fast-food hamburgers.  


Anyway, I guess I just don't know what all the hype is about.  Because really, I think In-N-Out is called In-N-Out because I wished I could get the food back out, as soon as it went in.  Barf.


BUT, in all fairness to California, the home of In-N-Out, and to keep my blog unbiased and fair (as always) I will now do a little review of Idaho too. 


Let me start out with an excerpt from the Idaho State Song.  And yes, proudly, this all comes from memory.  


"And here we have Idaho, winning her way to fame.  Silver and gold in the sunlight blaze and romance lies in her name."


Now, first of all, what in the world does the name Idaho have to do with romance?  That has always confused me about that song.  I don't know about you, but I've never found any romance in Idaho.  And fame?  What fame?  Oh yeah, famous potatoes.  


Idaho weakness number 1: The state song is pretty stupid and confusing.


Idaho weakness number 2: Holy crap it is cold!  I forgot how much colder Idaho Falls is than Utah until I went home for Christmas.  I guess, in all fairness to Idaho, Utah is warmer right now because of a huge cloud of pollution blanketing the whole Wasatch Front...worst air quality in America, but it keeps me warm.  


Idaho weakness number 3: Radio stations...are there any worth listening to?  So sad.  Too bad I don't like country music...there are plenty of country stations.


Idaho weakness number 4: What's with not plowing the roads when it snows? Or at least salting the roads?  Seriously.  They don't plow soon enough and then the snow gets packed down, which turns to ice, which never melts because it is so cold.  What's the deal with that?


Idaho weakness number 5: Seeing people from the past everywhere.  I don't really like running into people from the past...that's why it is the past...because it is supposed to be OVER, but everywhere I go in Idaho I run into people from my past.  I guess it just drives me crazy because I can't stop off at the grocery store in my exercise clothes like I can in SLC or go a whole day without make-up.  Sometimes I like anonymity.  


Idaho weakness number 6:  Lack of variety in restaurants, which I know is not Idaho's fault but is simply a result of not having a population big enough to support a bunch of awesome restaurants.  


Well, that's about it.  Other than that Idaho is pretty much perfect to me...garbage burning and all.  


And, life in Idaho can give me a good laugh.  A couple of weeks ago my brothers and I were talking about the honor roll field trip to North's Chuck Wagon with skating at Starlite Skating and how inevitably some kid would pig out way too much at the delicious and unlimited buffet and then barf on the bus on the way home.  


And that got us talking about field trips.  Tyler told us that when he was in second grade or something they went on a field trip to the seafood section at Albertson's to see the lobster tank.  I could not stop laughing.  I just thought Ty's little field trip to the "aquarium" was too funny.  Haaaaaaaaaaaaa field trip exhibit by day, dinner by night...poor lobsters and poor kids!  Such is life in  Idaho!  


Another funny thing about Idaho is the major lack of racial diversity.  So, a few weeks ago, a quick loan place in Idaho Falls was robbed by three black men.  Geniuses.  Seriously, if you are black in Idaho Falls you can't do anything wrong because you WILL NOT blend in and WILL NOT get away with it.  I mean with a black population of like 17 in Idaho Falls, what were these guys thinking?  I guess they ended up being from Oklahoma or something but still guys...rob a store in a less whitely homogeneous city if you want to get away with it.  For example, try robbing a store in Mobile, Alabama, not Idaho Falls, Idaho.  The sad thing is that I bet all 9 black males in Idaho Falls got turned in as suspects.  I can just see some do-gooder old lady calling the police after hearing about the robbery on the nightly news... "I think my neighbor might have robbed the cash store.  He's black."  Haaaaaaaaaa pretty funny and kind of sad for those innocent few black men in IF.  


Anyway, that's all on my little Idaho rant.  I do love the place, as I'm sure my regular blog readers know.  My mom doesn't think I'll last living in Idaho because I've gotten too used to living in Salt Lake.  I guess my hightailing it back to Utah only two weeks after moving to Idaho may be why she thinks that.  But, I'm just here for a visit, I promise.  I just was SO cold that my knuckles were bleeding, SO in need of friends (and I have none in Idaho...plenty of family and married friends but zero single friends, which is what I really need), and dying to get back to my wonderful gym in Utah.  


But, all I need is a good pair of winter gloves, some single friends, and a treadmill and I think I could become a real Idahoan again.  


Oh, and one of the best parts about coming back to SLC for a few days?...going to my book club "meeting" and realizing that NONE of us read the book we were supposed to read.  The book was Wuthering Heights and I just could not get past about page three of that book, and apparently neither could anyone else.  So boring and so hard to follow!  Does anybody love that book?  Should I give it a second chance?  


Anyway, I think I'm in the best book club ever because reading the book is just an excuse to get together once a month for dinner.  And, on Friday we're off to the Dominican Republic for a book club excursion.  Unfortunately, the little side trip we wanted to do to Haiti probably isn't the best idea right now.  Not that it was that great of an idea pre-earthquake, but still...Oh well, maybe another time.